Be Gentle to Yourself on New Year’s

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Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

Ah, January 1. A fresh start no matter how you look at it. Even if you aren’t ambitiously making goals, it is still the first day of a brand new year, and there’s something to a brand new year.

If you are making goals, check out my last New Year’s post on how to take time for successful goal-setting.

But if you aren’t…read on.

Has life handed you challenges over the past few years? Is the thought of adding goals to your already-full plate enough to make you crawl back into bed?

Sometimes goals are overrated.

Yep. I said it.

Oh, I think they are important. To progress in life, we must aim for something. However, one thing we overlook is that word: progress.

Life happens. Illness happens. Job change happens.

When those things happen, our goals end up on the backburner, and we often say forget it. I can’t do it now. I don’t have enough time. I might as well just quit on it and try again next year. And then we quit. And we don’t progress.

Why don’t we cut ourselves slack and revisit and revise our goals instead of quitting on them–and on ourselves?

Last year, I wrote about my own need to revise my goals. I wasn’t sure how or when I would manage to revise my submitted manuscript, but I knew I would do it.

Then life happened.

I had an opportunity to shift from teaching English to Spanish, and, as something that has been in the back of my head since I began teaching (my Spanish texts have always sat alongside my English texts on my classroom bookshelves), I jumped.

People thought I was crazy. I have 13 years in as an English teacher. Why change now?

Why not?

It was one of the most freeing things I’ve done. Just making that choice, knowing that I could do it, created an epiphany for me: If you don’t grab those opportunities when they arise, will you ever see them again? (Cue Eminem’s “Lose Yourself.”)

I also knew making that choice would impact my revisions. The paying job has to come first. Instead of giving up, I revised my goals. AGAIN.

As the first semester came to a close, out came my manuscript. I was so stoked to be back at it that I worked at it every single day. Looking back, the wait was good for me–and for the manuscript. Fresh eyes and a revived passion made a world of difference, and I’ve already made the first round of revisions.

Heading into the new year, I’ll begin the more arduous round of revising, but still with the same fresh eyes and revived passion. My new goal is to have it ready for submission by the end of May.

So don’t quit–on those goals, those dreams, or yourself. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing right now. Keep progressing, for that’s what we should really measure ourselves by.

Happy New Year!

 

Please share your journey with me! I love to hear from other writers. Not a writer? You should still sign up for my email list! There will be special freebies along the way, like snippets of The Devil Inside Me, backstory on characters, and explorations of the serial killing mind.

Goals: Revised and Resubmitted

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Photo by Sebastian Voortman on Pexels.com

Ah, what a couple of months will do to that pristine list of goals I created for 2019. I even blogged about the pride I had in myself for meeting my 2018 goals. I was so sure that 2019 would be the same.

In late 2018, I submitted my manuscript for The Devil Inside Me to a little under 20 agents and small press publishers–and received full requests from five of them. Five! Excited does not even begin to describe my feelings. I had done my research. I followed tips from top people in the industry. My hard work was paying off. My plan for 2019 was to get an agent or publish with a small press, and I could see it coming to fruition. While I waited to hear, I continued writing short stories, started The Devil Before Me, and began work on a short story chapbook.

Then, slowly, one rejection arrived, then another, and still another.

I was buoyed by the next two rejections–which were R&Rs (revise and resubmit). They both had the same suggestions for edits, and I learned through my participation in a bootcamp class that if more than one agent is telling you the same thing, they’re probably right. And they are.

Where does that leave my list of goals? That, too, needed a revise and resubmit–to myself. I wanted to start right away with the edits. I took care of the easy ones, but the rest will require some undivided time and attention from me. Right now, that is a virtual impossibility. I will be switching from teaching full-time English to full-time Spanish for the next school year, and with that comes brand-new lesson planning. I am also on our bargaining team for our school contract. Our next meeting is from 3:30pm to 8:30pm, if that gives you an indication of time commitment.

So what to do? The logical part of my brain says wait until summer. The perfectionist in me screams, “You must start now!”

My answer arrived when I was fishing for something on C. S. Lakin’s website, Live Write Thrive. I found this blog of hers: “A Time to Write and a Time to Not Write.”

In it, she explains that writers will go through seasons, a time of writing and a time of not writing–and that it is perfectly fine and even normal to do so. I felt as if she were speaking directly to me when she said that “writers, like all creatives, can be obsessive.” I was feeling that I was failing at my writing if I dared shelve edits until summer break. However, with all the extra responsibilities currently on my plate, I’m often mentally exhausted when I get home at the end of the day, and my creativity is sapped. Lakin went on to say that occasionally her “brain feels as if it is going to explode or implode from all the heavy thinking.”

Yes, yes, yes.

I was able to make a compromise with myself after reading her article. The heavy edits I’m saving until summer break, but I’ll continue my other weekly writing commitments, like blog work and short story work. An additional benefit to this is the fresh eyes I’ll bring to my manuscript.

We can’t be afraid to re-align our plans. Pressing pause does not equal stopping, and it certainly doesn’t equal failing. Revise and resubmit those goals–for yourself!